Wednesday, June 22, 2011

A Colorado Auction

A house down the road has been bank owned for a few years, and yesterday it was up for auction on the premises. So we walked down to see what a foreclosure auction was like.

The house looks better than the picture, but it does look like a mobile home, was built about 15 years ago by a scrappy couple who are long gone. The house has two front doors into the same room. ("Don't you be coming through my door bitch.") It sits on five acres with nice views on a steep hill.

When we got to the house only a security guy was there with his small dog. He offered us a free pen with the name of his cleaning company on it. After a while a real estate agent pulled up in his Range Rover with a golf theme license plate and a salmon golf theme shirt too. He had been the listing agent till the bank got drastic.

Then the auction group rolled in, in one SUV. They had gotten lost on the way. Three guys in white shirts and ties and a hefty blonde gal with a pile of papers. The auctioneer looked like Kenny Rogers with white hair parted in the center, show biz. Then there was a guy with an earpiece who seemed to be wearing a Bill Gates wig. , and a gnarly looking little guy: maybe he'd been a jockey, or in rodeo, or maybe a ventriloquist dummy? He stayed behind the car.

They asked us if we were there to bid? I said no we were there for free cookies. When the auctioneer plugged in his amp Jon said, "Is this going to be a square dance?" He said, "That could be arranged."

Since there was no one there to bid, it was time to get the auction started. They were allowing on line bidding, with a teaser minimum of $50,000, and warned the folks on line not to push that orange button unless you really mean it. There was no video of the auction, so the auctioneer got started as if he had a big crowd there, "I want to welcome you all, ladies and gentlemen," and rolled into that amazing monologue that auctioneers do.

They had one bid for $50,000, on line. Nothing else came in. The house across the street is for sale for a million and a half, also on five acres. Wow. The bank has the right to reject the offer, but it was pretty stark and surprising. They packed up and headed off to their next auction.

I haven't posted on this blog in more than a year. I like writing but I didn't like experiencing my life as possible blog material, and there's something uncomfortable (for me) about posting my dear diary life on line. But I thought I'd pop in with this one.