Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Why I dread the telephone
Busy at my desk when the phone rings, and Jon's in the basement.
"Hello, may I speak to Sally Cruikshank?" (charming young man's voice.)
"This is she."
"I have Sheila Dumptruck on the line on behalf of Harvey Gasbag. Please hold."
I grab paper, wonder what this is about. Harvey Gasbag is a big producer who has his own company even.
Wait two minutes. Sheila's on the line.
"Sally, been so long. Remember me?"
"I used to work for Stuart Lostwallet."
(some agent who found me no work and never bought lunch.)
Sheila continues:"I'm a big fan.. and so is Harvey"
Now I'm thinking she's calling because Sir Gasbag has heard I have interesting ideas and would like to develop them. I'm thinking I've just won the lottery. I feel lively and perky. Yes, Sheila, yes!
But that's not what it's about. She's calling to ask me to vote for Gasbag's latest film as Best Picture. Man, they've got to be desperate if they're calling me.
all the words I'm thinking but don't say as I politely say I'll look at the Gasbag Epic. (But I won't.) I would have rather gotten one of those pre-recorded Bill Clinton phone calls.