Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Midnight at Medford

The picture is this morning in Colorado. Since then there's been much more snow, and it's still falling. A miracle that the internet still works. Now back to our story:

It was almost midnight when I got to my mother's assisted living center. I took a Rapid Rover van instead of driving, and got dropped off in the parking lot. There's a glassed in walkway that wraps around the building with chairs all along it. As I walked towards the door I noticed there were hunched over people sitting in all the chairs. But it was so late, and so dark. Had the nurses forgotten them? What was going on here? CREEPY!

Once inside I saw they were Halloween decorations, figures without armatures, that's why they were all slumped over, with legs made of pantyhose stuffed with newspapers. I took some pictures with the cel phone while I was there. They kind of spooked me the whole time.

My mother broke her hip and had hip surgery. The anesthesia has warped her mind, just as it has every time she's had surgery the last six years. But now she's almost 95, so we're just hoping she'll come back to herself.

In the morning she'd start out okay. Then as the day would go on she'd get increasingly paranoid and talk incessantly. She was never a paranoid person, and I don't remember getting the full force of paranoia focussed on me before from anyone. I had to switch my water glass with my mother's and take a sip to prove I wasn't poisoning her.

Saturday morning at the breakfast table she was really on, making observations on everything and everyone around her. The big unknown was what she would say next: it could be funny, insulting, or just peculiar. And people were listening. Not many people are funny at age 94.

After doing a wrap up on all the unappealing food on her tray she looked across the room where a nurse with a white head scarf was hand feeding a patient. She said, "Why does that man have a parachute on his head?" Quick, change subject!

Somebody's granddaughter was leaving and said to me, "I love your shirt." My mother said, "Did she just say 'I love you' to you? People are so familiar these days."


Namowal said...

Manikins and large dolls are creepy in the daytime. I'd hate to run into any in the dark. Geez. What are the decorators thinking!?
Sorry to hear the anesthesia was playing mean tricks with your mom's mind. I know what it's like to have my mom say and point out the unexpected. Once we were at a restaurant where a bridal shower was taking place. Most of the guests were black.
Mom turned to me and blurted "The Emancipation Proclamation!" like it was a punchline. As you said, "Quick, change subject!"

Sally said...

Namowal, you get this so exactly. Have another funny story but it's maybe too off color to post.

Anonymous said...

Have you talked to her since this posting? Does she seem better?...Katy

Mean Jean said...

Write down what she says and sell it to Jay Leno. Then you can deny all knowledge after you cash the checks.

Sally said...

She was doing poorly today. Weird to think that only five days ago she seemed like she was working up her Jay Leno act, like you said, Mean Jean.

Speaking of Jay Leno, and since you know I've been in some weird circumstances...

Here's my take on the pilots who overshot their destination. Their first defense was "We were in a heated discussion," later changed to "busy on our laptops."

Come on guys, out of the closet. Why do you think they call it the cockpit?

(Jay Leno, you heard it here first.)

prb said...

I like your take on what the pilots were really doing! Hope your mom gets more normal. Keep trying to laugh. It helps.